Photo by Justin Shen, Unsplash
Photo by Justin Shen, Unsplash
Portland is a pristine city. Yes, parts of it got trashed during the protests five years ago, and yes, we have a serious homeless problem. As do most big cities these days.
“You go out to Portland, people die out there. Many people have died over the years in Portland. Portland is, I don’t know how anybody lives there. It’s amazing, but it’s, it’s anarchy out there. That’s what they want. They want anarchy. Have you seen Portland at all? If you take a look what’s happening in Portland. It’s, it has been going on for years. Just people out of control, crazy. We’re going to stop that very soon.” —Imbecile-in-Chief last week
Yes, he’s right. People ARE dying in Portland. We’re dying from cancer, from strokes, from heart attacks, from traffic accidents, from old age, from all the same maladies and diseases that people die from in Biloxi Mississippi and Schenectady New York. It’s called ‘end of life.’
That’s what Portlanders are doing “out there.” We’re living. And when it’s our time to die, we die. Meanwhile, we’re enjoying ourselves. The fact that the bronzer-slathered baboon has yet to cite anything specific to justify beating his war drums should tell you everything.
Portland is a blue town in a blue state. That’s his reasoning. The end. He knows that if his goons roll up Burnside in their camo-clad Humvees, it will humiliate the people he recently said he “hates,” and will elicit cheers from MAGA country. It’s not as if it’ll cost him many votes here.
That’s what this is about. The Great Divider spreading hate and widening those political chasms from coast to coast.
Portland is a pristine city. Yes, parts of it got trashed during the protests five years ago, and yes, we have a serious homeless problem. As do most big cities these days.
But only a shallow, not terribly bright dictator wannabe would even think to violate the Posse Comitatus Act and send in masked goons with orders to use “full force.”
So bask in the applause from Fox News and your sycophants, Trump. Send in your thugs, we can’t stop you.
Just please have their quartermasters provide each troop with a rake. Forest Park is overdue for a thorough raking.
Make yourselves useful while you’re here.
Honorary crash test dummy for Hammocks R Us, intrepid toxicity tester for Laphroaig Distillery, mobile Javaslinger, moonshiner in training, part time writer, part time foodie, part time flirt, ponderer of all things Cosmic, hot sauce aficionado, skeptic of conspiracy theorists, challenger of balderdashery, antithetical to all things Trump, Fool Emeritus from Whatsamatta U, three-time champion over corporate evil, downtrodden survivor of the Coulter Wars, psychotic women, cancer, heart disease and my own poor judgement.
Help Support Factkeepers!
{"id":null,"mode":"form","open_style":"in_place","currency_code":"USD","currency_symbol":"$","currency_type":"decimal","blank_flag_url":"https:\/\/factkeepers.com\/wp-content\/plugins\/tip-jar-wp\/\/assets\/images\/flags\/blank.gif","flag_sprite_url":"https:\/\/factkeepers.com\/wp-content\/plugins\/tip-jar-wp\/\/assets\/images\/flags\/flags.png","default_amount":500,"top_media_type":"none","featured_image_url":false,"featured_embed":"","header_media":null,"file_download_attachment_data":null,"recurring_options_enabled":true,"recurring_options":{"never":{"selected":true,"after_output":"One time only"},"weekly":{"selected":false,"after_output":"Every week"},"monthly":{"selected":false,"after_output":"Every month"},"yearly":{"selected":false,"after_output":"Every year"}},"strings":{"current_user_email":"","current_user_name":"","link_text":"Leave a tip","complete_payment_button_error_text":"Check info and try again","payment_verb":"Pay","payment_request_label":"Factkeepers.com","form_has_an_error":"Please check and fix the errors above","general_server_error":"Something isn't working right at the moment. Please try again.","form_title":"Help Support Factkeepers","form_subtitle":null,"currency_search_text":"Country or Currency here","other_payment_option":"Other payment option","manage_payments_button_text":"Manage your payments","thank_you_message":"Thank you for being a supporter!","payment_confirmation_title":"Factkeepers.com","receipt_title":"Your Receipt","print_receipt":"Print Receipt","email_receipt":"Email Receipt","email_receipt_sending":"Sending receipt...","email_receipt_success":"Email receipt successfully sent","email_receipt_failed":"Email receipt failed to send. Please try again.","receipt_payee":"Paid to","receipt_statement_descriptor":"This will show up on your statement as","receipt_date":"Date","receipt_transaction_id":"Transaction ID","receipt_transaction_amount":"Amount","refund_payer":"Refund from","login":"Log in to manage your payments","manage_payments":"Manage Payments","transactions_title":"Your Transactions","transaction_title":"Transaction Receipt","transaction_period":"Plan Period","arrangements_title":"Your Plans","arrangement_title":"Manage Plan","arrangement_details":"Plan Details","arrangement_id_title":"Plan ID","arrangement_payment_method_title":"Payment Method","arrangement_amount_title":"Plan Amount","arrangement_renewal_title":"Next renewal date","arrangement_action_cancel":"Cancel Plan","arrangement_action_cant_cancel":"Cancelling is currently not available.","arrangement_action_cancel_double":"Are you sure you'd like to cancel?","arrangement_cancelling":"Cancelling Plan...","arrangement_cancelled":"Plan Cancelled","arrangement_failed_to_cancel":"Failed to cancel plan","back_to_plans":"\u2190 Back to Plans","update_payment_method_verb":"Update","sca_auth_description":"Your have a pending renewal payment which requires authorization.","sca_auth_verb":"Authorize renewal payment","sca_authing_verb":"Authorizing payment","sca_authed_verb":"Payment successfully authorized!","sca_auth_failed":"Unable to authorize! Please try again.","login_button_text":"Log in","login_form_has_an_error":"Please check and fix the errors above","uppercase_search":"Search","lowercase_search":"search","uppercase_page":"Page","lowercase_page":"page","uppercase_items":"Items","lowercase_items":"items","uppercase_per":"Per","lowercase_per":"per","uppercase_of":"Of","lowercase_of":"of","back":"Back to plans","zip_code_placeholder":"Zip\/Postal Code","download_file_button_text":"Download File","input_field_instructions":{"tip_amount":{"placeholder_text":"How much would you like to donate? You can change this amount to anything you would like.","initial":{"instruction_type":"normal","instruction_message":"How much would you like to donate? You can change this amount to anything you would like."},"empty":{"instruction_type":"error","instruction_message":"How much would you like to donate? You can change this amount to anything you would like."},"invalid_curency":{"instruction_type":"error","instruction_message":"How much would you like to donate? You can change this amount to anything you would like."}},"recurring":{"placeholder_text":"Recurring","initial":{"instruction_type":"normal","instruction_message":"How often would you like to donate this?"},"success":{"instruction_type":"success","instruction_message":"How often would you like to donate this?"},"empty":{"instruction_type":"error","instruction_message":"How often would you like to donate this?"}},"name":{"placeholder_text":"Name on Credit Card","initial":{"instruction_type":"normal","instruction_message":"Enter the name on your card."},"success":{"instruction_type":"success","instruction_message":"Enter the name on your card."},"empty":{"instruction_type":"error","instruction_message":"Please enter the name on your card."}},"privacy_policy":{"terms_title":"Terms and conditions","terms_body":null,"terms_show_text":"View Terms","terms_hide_text":"Hide Terms","initial":{"instruction_type":"normal","instruction_message":"I agree to the terms."},"unchecked":{"instruction_type":"error","instruction_message":"Please agree to the terms."},"checked":{"instruction_type":"success","instruction_message":"I agree to the terms."}},"email":{"placeholder_text":"Your email address","initial":{"instruction_type":"normal","instruction_message":"Enter your email address"},"success":{"instruction_type":"success","instruction_message":"Enter your email address"},"blank":{"instruction_type":"error","instruction_message":"Enter your email address"},"not_an_email_address":{"instruction_type":"error","instruction_message":"Make sure you have entered a valid email address"}},"note_with_tip":{"placeholder_text":"Your note here...","initial":{"instruction_type":"normal","instruction_message":"Attach a note to your tip (optional)"},"empty":{"instruction_type":"normal","instruction_message":"Attach a note to your tip (optional)"},"not_empty_initial":{"instruction_type":"normal","instruction_message":"Attach a note to your tip (optional)"},"saving":{"instruction_type":"normal","instruction_message":"Saving note..."},"success":{"instruction_type":"success","instruction_message":"Note successfully saved!"},"error":{"instruction_type":"error","instruction_message":"Unable to save note note at this time. Please try again."}},"email_for_login_code":{"placeholder_text":"Your email address","initial":{"instruction_type":"normal","instruction_message":"Enter your email to log in."},"success":{"instruction_type":"success","instruction_message":"Enter your email to log in."},"blank":{"instruction_type":"error","instruction_message":"Enter your email to log in."},"empty":{"instruction_type":"error","instruction_message":"Enter your email to log in."}},"login_code":{"initial":{"instruction_type":"normal","instruction_message":"Check your email and enter the login code."},"success":{"instruction_type":"success","instruction_message":"Check your email and enter the login code."},"blank":{"instruction_type":"error","instruction_message":"Check your email and enter the login code."},"empty":{"instruction_type":"error","instruction_message":"Check your email and enter the login code."}},"stripe_all_in_one":{"initial":{"instruction_type":"normal","instruction_message":"Enter your credit card details here."},"empty":{"instruction_type":"error","instruction_message":"Enter your credit card details here."},"success":{"instruction_type":"normal","instruction_message":"Enter your credit card details here."},"invalid_number":{"instruction_type":"error","instruction_message":"The card number is not a valid credit card number."},"invalid_expiry_month":{"instruction_type":"error","instruction_message":"The card's expiration month is invalid."},"invalid_expiry_year":{"instruction_type":"error","instruction_message":"The card's expiration year is invalid."},"invalid_cvc":{"instruction_type":"error","instruction_message":"The card's security code is invalid."},"incorrect_number":{"instruction_type":"error","instruction_message":"The card number is incorrect."},"incomplete_number":{"instruction_type":"error","instruction_message":"The card number is incomplete."},"incomplete_cvc":{"instruction_type":"error","instruction_message":"The card's security code is incomplete."},"incomplete_expiry":{"instruction_type":"error","instruction_message":"The card's expiration date is incomplete."},"incomplete_zip":{"instruction_type":"error","instruction_message":"The card's zip code is incomplete."},"expired_card":{"instruction_type":"error","instruction_message":"The card has expired."},"incorrect_cvc":{"instruction_type":"error","instruction_message":"The card's security code is incorrect."},"incorrect_zip":{"instruction_type":"error","instruction_message":"The card's zip code failed validation."},"invalid_expiry_year_past":{"instruction_type":"error","instruction_message":"The card's expiration year is in the past"},"card_declined":{"instruction_type":"error","instruction_message":"The card was declined."},"missing":{"instruction_type":"error","instruction_message":"There is no card on a customer that is being charged."},"processing_error":{"instruction_type":"error","instruction_message":"An error occurred while processing the card."},"invalid_request_error":{"instruction_type":"error","instruction_message":"Unable to process this payment, please try again or use alternative method."},"invalid_sofort_country":{"instruction_type":"error","instruction_message":"The billing country is not accepted by SOFORT. Please try another country."}}}},"fetched_oembed_html":false}
{"date_format":"F j, Y","time_format":"g:i a","wordpress_permalink_only":"https:\/\/factkeepers.com\/living-and-dying-in-portland\/","all_default_visual_states":"inherit","modal_visual_state":false,"user_is_logged_in":false,"stripe_api_key":"pk_live_40P3DgGDAHEP1QtJ0nOU4nms5JYHI8GbQ05dYiB1S8OPP5oMSIpOCCeeIawOyeW6bWDkDMWdUeggbhxOQTSA6aedu00ROAbhXBd","stripe_account_country_code":"US","setup_link":"https:\/\/factkeepers.com\/wp-admin\/admin.php?page=tip-jar-wp&mpwpadmin1=welcome&mpwpadmin_lightbox=do_wizard_health_check","close_button_url":"https:\/\/factkeepers.com\/wp-content\/plugins\/tip-jar-wp\/\/assets\/images\/closebtn.png"}
