Nothing says “government waste and reckless spending” quite like promising to hand out roughly $1.2 TRILLION to American adults—provided, of course, that the correct political team wins the election.
Republished with permission from Norman Berry
“Did I hear that right! If we elect republicans and win the house and senate every adult in American gets a dividend check for $5,000.00 shoot even the Democrats like to give out Money. Should be a Win Win for everyone.”
Well… apparently fiscal responsibility has been temporarily suspended for the midterms.
Nothing says “government waste and reckless spending” quite like promising to hand out roughly $1.2 TRILLION to American adults—provided, of course, that the correct political team wins the election.
And the really beautiful part is that it isn’t actually your money. It’s government money.
Which means the government has to get it from somewhere.
Maybe tariffs. Maybe borrowing. Maybe printing it. Maybe a little bit of all three. But I’m sure the details will be worked out after we celebrate the $5,000 check.
And let’s not overlook the timing: “Vote for us, and you get $5,000.”
I can already hear the campaign slogans:
- Make America Rich Again.
- Vote Republican—Your $5,000 Depends On It!
Of course, if Democrats proposed sending everyone $5,000 right before an election, I’m pretty sure we’d hear about “buying votes,” “handouts,” “socialism,” “deficit spending,” and the impending collapse of Western civilization.
But when our guy does it…
WIN-WIN!
And apparently I’m not the only one who finds the irony amusing. Joe Lonsdale—Palantir cofounder, major GOP donor and Trump supporter—called the proposal a “bread and circus” bribe.
So I guess the new definition of fiscal conservatism is:
Spend $1.2 trillion… but make sure you spend it on voters right before they vote.
Hey, I’m all for putting money back in Americans’ pockets.
I just have one tiny question:
Where’s the $1.2 trillion coming from?
Because if the answer is “the government,” we’ve successfully solved the government’s money problem by giving the government more money to give to us.
That’s some next-level economics right there.
Win-win, indeed.
Norman Berry also known as the pro-survival rap artist ChillEB is an accomplished voiceover talent, jingle writer and screen actor. He recorded the theme song for the Golden State Warriors “Don’t Stop The Noise,” appeared in the Warner Brothers movie Mad City, starred in national commercials for Sega Genesis, PSA’s for the San Francisco Giants & the Contra Costa County Library System, Double Rainbow Ice Cream, Partnership For Drug Free America, Department Of Energy, Nike, Nickelodeon, National Basketball Association (NBA) and most recently recorded The Oakland Raiders theme song (for the 2015-2016 season), among more.
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